I haven't mentioned my friend, Angel, lately since this blog is about Keven. So as a reminder I will say she is one of my closest friends in the world, someone I love like a daughter because she's only 25, so she is young enough to be my child. I have known her for 9 years and went through the horror of watching drugs (meth, heroin) destroy her life and then watch her TRIUMPH over them for THREE years and live a wonderful, drug free life as as the beautiful, intelligent, compassionate and sweet woman she was born to be.
Last year she re-hooked up with the MONSTER that she used to use with and its been downhill since then. She's lost her money, her looks, her friends, her health, her everything. I think she still has a job but I wonder what the hell they think of her, I hear she looks like "shit".
I have remained close with her through the last year and done all I can do to help (which we all know is not much) but for the last couple of months she has not wanted to see me and now is not returning my calls or texts.
Her sister has confirmed that she is in a very bad place.
Its one thing when you see your own child go through this....its horrible. But for some reason seeing Angel go through it AFTER EXPERIENCING THREE YEARS OF SOBRIETY it makes me more angry than anything. I am mostly angry at HIM - the MONSTER who is an older man that uses her and she ALLOWS it. He uses her in every way imaginable. Its sick, its much more dangerous to her than the drugs. Its disgusting.
I woke up at 10:30 this morning feeling too depressed to get out of bed (no reason to be depressed....I don't know what's wrong with me). But when I got the email from Angel's sister I got angry. I am going to drive around and find her today and make her look me in the eye. It may not serve a purpose but I have to do it. I have to look at her and convey to her how much I love her.
I have a bad feeling that if I don't see her now, I may never see her again. I love this woman. I want to slap her, but I love her. Damn these drugs. DAMN THEM!
Peace, Hope and Love, Barbara
2 comments:
I think that addiction prompts about every negative emotion in those that love an addict, and anger is sure one of them. I hope you find her, to at least be able to lay your eyes on her. I'm so sorry to read about this. :(
I am sorry about Angel. She had it good for 3 years. It does appear that after 3 years of sobriety, it was her choice to start again. That is a sad thing.
Post a Comment