August 1, 2011

More Germs to Deal With

Addiction is like an infection that spreads from the addict to everyone they have close contact with. 

I've decided that every time I experience this phenomenon I will use this phrase.  Lets hope you don't see it on here to often.  

Yesterday at 4 I got a text from Anthony.  

But, the text was not about him, it was about his brother, "T" being arrested and taken to jail.  The only reason this matters to me AT ALL is because I have become close to Ant's grandmother.  I still am not sure why Ant wanted me to know, I know he was looking for some comfort and reassurance that it was not his fault...but it probably was so I didn't go there.

I was, however, grateful that I knew in advance because I was able to look online for all the details of when and where T was arrested and where he was in the booking process, etc. So when the grandmother called me at 8 am I was prepared, I already knew, I was able to calm her a bit and give her some info.  She asked me to do a favor related to getting his car out of impound which I did.  T was never an addict but he got busted selling and since it was his first offense, he did his time and got out pretty quickly and has been on the straight and narrow ever since but on probation.  He has been warned again and again to stay away from his brother because it would likely land him in jail.  And, it did.  I don't know the exact circumstances and it doesn't matter.  

What does matter to me is the grandmother.  This woman deserves some kind of a medal or an honor for enduring this crap for almost 40 years (38 to be exact).  She lost her daughter to it and has been living with Anthony's addiction since then (daughter was 34 at time of death, Ant was 14).  So its been non-stop for her.  She's a good person and goes to Al-Anon and understands addiction, but this is TOO MUCH for her.  She lives in fear that Ant will die and T will be devastated because they are so close, and pretty much all each other has besides their grandparents (who are both older and not in great health).

So I didn't mind being in on this, but it goes to show, once again, that one addict can affect the lives of everyone around him.  Now his brother is in jail .... that really makes me sad.

Peace, Hope and Love, Barbara


Anonymous said...

Wow, I just read your post about Ant from december of 2009. It just goes to show how strong addiction is. The struggle is still there, even worse, the girlfriend gone and has moved on, the oppurtunity to move to another area and start over has come and gone and now he is on the run... and what about K --- will he make it this time? will he relapse... I just want him to live a normal life...whatever that is!!!!

Anna said...

Here we see why some families cut all ties with the addict. I have not done this as you know but I do understand why. They abandon one to save the many.

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