Without going into a ton of detail, I am waiting for Keven to call from jail. At court yesterday he was given yet another week to choose what he wants to do. After a long talk with our attorney, I've had some difficult introspection and decisions to make. I'll share more when I know the outcome.
Bottom line: The addict can suck the life out of the entire family, IF you let him.
Its not fair, but that's how it is. And the real unfairness of it all is that when you choose not to let them suck the life out of you - that in itself can become all consuming, draining, stressful and emotional.
So its a constant battle of staying on my toes and going against my nature as a mother.
Total bottom line: I'm drained. I feel like that apple.
Peace, Hope and Love, Barbara
8 comments:
I know exactly what you mean. There does not seem to be anything else when this happens. I am glad that I don't have to deal with it anymore. I strongly believe that it has saved my life.
oh yes....the addict can become and continue to be the focus of our life, in such a negative way, and I feel that we(moms)are especially just so damn vulnerable in being sucked into the dark vortex of it all. But,wow....trying to make that change is certainly not pleasant either...ugh. It just feels so unnatural, I know what you mean. :(
I'm sorry you're going through this. Please let us know. Thinking of you here.
It would not be so bad if the addict child that sucks all the joy out of a room was in turn..filled with that joy. I would not mind that "drained" feeling if I thought my draining would some how help. Sorry you're going through "it"....and I know how the "it" feels.
I hope he goes to drug court. I am interested in know more about that. Is there a place I can look it up? That was not an option for my son and he will be going back to jail soon (with any luck) so can you email me and let me know about it? Tori@TeamTori.com
I would really appreciate. I pray he makes the right decision.
Bristol, I can understand that. I am glad you've been able to get to this point of self preservation!
Lori, yes, mothers have it especially hard I think. Thanks for caring. I'll let you all know what's up when I find out.
Tori, I wish there was a website or something that did a good job of explaining drug court, or in Keven's case "Recovery Court". I will search around and email you later today. There's a big difference between the traditional drug courts and this program.
I admire you. Please hang in there and keep taking care of you.
(P.S.... love the new look here !)
Keep us posted, Barbara. Thinking of you....
Barbara - Still praying for you and Keven! ((Hugs))
Post a Comment