"Every day can be Thanksgiving"
That was the comment Syd left yesterday and its so true. Some days its harder to find the good and/or to be thankful, but I've never lost my gratefulness through this nightmare of addiction. I'm well aware of how blessed I am in so many ways.
Yesterday we had both Keven and Anthony at our dinner table with the rest of my family (10 people total). It was a beautiful thing to see my mom and Anthony hug, a long tearful hug full of forgiveness from her, and for him - he felt he totally undeserving.
Keven spent one last night here and today my sister will drive him up to 3rd Step House (I have plans to hang out with a friend and see a movie today - new George Clooney, review later).
This is going to be different than anything he has done before. He says he wants it, he's ready, and for me to not worry because he'll be fine. So I'm taking his word for it.
I've learned a lot about myself over the last week. It was a horrible week in so many ways, but also an good week.
Did I tell you Keven invited me to a speaker meeting Wed. night and we went together? The speaker was one of his best friend's uncle. Kev thought it was the best speaker meeting he's ever been to. I enjoyed it too, I love AA mtgs way more than Al-Anon. I've never felt the love and support in an Al-Anon meeting but it just exudes from most AA mtgs. This one was in a dirty, smelly old building in downtown Los Angeles, (not something I'm used to but I felt comfortable there). A few people stared at us like "where the hell are they from?" but we were welcome by all.
The speaker even used Keven in the beginning of his talk (they had met on the phone earlier that day and spent over an hour talking). I met a woman who had lost her daughter to heroin at age 20. She herself was struggling with her own sobriety but she sought me out and hugged me and was full of smiles.
So today he starts a new chapter of his sobriety. He has one week clean. I am going to sleep good tonight.
Peace, Hope and Love,