Well, the other shoe dropped. He stayed out all night last night. Feel free to say "I told you so" but, I had already prepared myself so I am not surprised, just upset for my mother. How do I help her to learn to Let Go? She worries even more when she doesn't know where he is, because she knows what he's up to.
I packed his stuff and put it on the front porch. He was suppose to move into the sober living TODAY. If he chooses to stop by here I will be here (luckily this is one of my last days off before I work full time so I can stay home all day (except between 1:00 - 2:00) to watch over things if he comes by and tries to get in). Again, who is suffering: my mother!
I will call the cops if he tries to break in. How the hell am I suppose to leave my mother home alone while I work when he's out there? I rather have him in jail.
Oh, you'll love this - its so predictable. Keven and I were watching a movie together in my room (True Grit) and he gets a call from Anthony. Low and behold, Anthony was kicked out of Unidos already for using fake pee. A few minutes after the call Keven said he was going out with Andrew. I didn't even try and stop him, I knew the real plan. So he left, saying he wouldn't be late and never came home.
He took Suboxone yesterday so he's probably using meth or bath salts again. Its no surprise that after a week of not using, after being loved and cared for by his family, he still chooses the drugs. Its what addicts do. I had no illusions that it would be any other way, but still, I had a bit of hope that he'd at least make it into the Sober Living. Oh well.
Addiction is a family disease. I'm working on my recovery now more than ever. I wish there was some way to help my mother (she won't go to a meeting).
Thanks for following along with the stupid ass drama going on over here. I am so sick of it. I miss writing about other things. Maybe I will go back to my old blog and try to regain some of my SELF.
Peace, Hope and Love,