July 17, 2010

Letter from Anthony

Just got the kind of letter that makes you smile hard while a tear trickles down your cheek.

The smile is because the letter was for me...it was not about him (although he mentions how well he's doing and how excited he is about this "second" chance).

He wrote because his gf has been telling him about Keven and therefore he knows how hurt I must feel, how frustrated.  He wrote a whole page telling me what a wonderful mother I am and listing all my good qualities.  It was very touching.

The teardrop was because he implied that Keven doesn't realize how blessed he is to have me as a mom, etc.  Its true.  Keven won't even talk to me these days.  Anthony lost his mom so he speaks from experience when he says sometimes you can't appreciate something till you no longer have it...

I hope Anth continues to do well.  I felt the love in that letter.  I needed it.  I hate to say this, but I feel so much more love from him than I do from Keven.


Peace, Hope and Love, Barbara

8 comments:

~~BRB Queen~~ said...

Ugh. Bittersweet. I hope you enjoy your concert. You deserve it!

~ Tabitha ~ said...

That letter sounds like it was something you needed to read.To
feel your efforts are noted as a
parent,Barb.This was a touching read.

Sometimes when our kids are hurting us,they know exactly how much we mean to them.And that can make it harder for them to face us.You will always know in your heart how much your son means to you.And one day,he will tell you how much he you mean to him.

Syd said...

I believe that the alcoholic/addict hurt those who care about them the most. And when they are in recovery they make amends. I am sure that Keven loves you.

Bristolvol said...

It's probably just a temporary thing. I don't know why they do it. Try not to take it personal. I am glad that Anthony gave you some comfort today. My daughter has been acting like she does not have a mother for over two years now. I hope you are enjoying your concert tonight. Hugs and fun!

A Mom's Serious Blunder said...

The love is there Barbara. It is so hard to show love when you hate your self and I guarantee you right now Kevin hates everything. Doesn't mean he doesn't love you just means right now he is not capable of showing it, I hope that is some how comforting??? Because of course what's not to love... you are a caring, supportive wonderful mom...who works so hard to do the right thing and really that's all you can be right?

Kristin said...

What a gift to get from Anthony today! Just what you needed. Keven feels your support. You have always been there for him but right now, he is taking your love for granted. He will come around. In the meantime, enjoy the letter from Anthony and really listen to the words.
xx kris

Kristi (Jake's Mom) said...

Glad you received this letter from Anthony when it sounds like you needed it! You are a wonderful mom!! I have no doubt that Kevin loves you, you're his mom and I believe he would be totally lost without you! We often hurt the one's we're closest to.

Hope you had a GREAT time last night!!

LisaC said...

Ant's letter was a gift from God to you because he knew that you needed it. Keven, somewhere deep inside, knows his choices are hurting you and rather than face you he has to treat you harshly so that he can continue making the choices that he is making. Hopefully recovery will return and so will love and amends from him. That being said, it is good to hear that Ant is doing well.

Hang in there and take care of you!

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