When all else fails...
adopt a dog.
(details on "Sugar" later).
For the last two days since he used, I have seen my old Keven. I don't know why, I know it probably won't last, but its there...the old smile, the old smirk, the old sweetness. He brought his gf's mom over to meet my family today and we all sat in our yard for over an our chatting and laughing and telling fun stories. It felt like the Twilight Zone to me...not used to such normalcy. In a few minutes he's joining us at my brother's house for a BBQ of burgers, etc. Not typical for even my old Keven (unless it was a "real" holiday like Christmas or HIS birthday).
Tom left a comment that is the only possible hint I have at why he may be acting so calm, so nice, so pleasant. (details later...I'm in a hurry...sorry!). I also wonder - did he not take his meds the last few days? Does that make him feel better? Is he just relieved that he relapsed and confessed?
Also, he's not bitching that I took his car away. He started to yesterday but gave up. This is so not like him. I like this new behavior but I know better than to get used to it.
THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR SUPPORT, LOVE, WISDOM!
I will read blogs tonight to catch up with all of you.
Love,
Barbara
10 comments:
Perhaps Keven's anxiety level built up so heavily, scared that he was going to relapse and go out of control...wind up back in jail...etc. Then he relapsed. And it wasn't the end of the world...and yes, he pissed off a lot of people-but it's not the end of the world and he feels relief.
Thanks for the update, and so glad you had some "normalcy" today - actually sounded even better than "normal".
Can't wait to hear more about Sugar - you know how I love dogs and dog stories!
Love & hugs!
Cute little dog. Hope your day stayed good.
I can't tell from the post if the day started well and then he went back to the same old scary stuff or not. That being said, the dog is adorable and will love you so much, no matter how you are feeling or the mood you are in. Take in that pure unadulterated love that Sugar will give to you. And I continue to pray for you and for Keven.
What a cute little doggie:) I really hope you have a peaceful night's sleep and that K will keep moving forward one step at a time. We all have backsteps. Much love and light your way.
I love the dog...so cute and such a wonderful companion for you. I hope that the day continued to go well.
You and Keven are in my thougths and prayers.
Carolyn
Wait, I just reread the beginning of the post. Keven is back to the scary stuff. The drugs (street drugs) wore off. The backlash is bad. That is the downside of using them to self-medicate.
You need outside help. This roller coaster is too difficult to hold on to.
Let us know,
xx kris
Something that I heard many years ago was how drugs stunt teens growth in maturity. I saw that after my son was off drugs for a while. I hope Keven can eventually find a place of post-drug-normalcy.
And I hope your week is a great and peaceful one dear friend.
That's an interesting concept that drugs stunt the emotional maturity of teens. So drugs keep a young person at the emotional state they are at when they start using? I think perhaps there's something else that stunts the emotional development, either an experience or a neurochemical situation, and that using is merely a symptom. The question then could be, would the kid have matured if he/she did not use? I started using when I was a teen. I stopped in my 20s. My emotional maturity level stayed at a preteen level for many years after that. It was working the Steps that helped me move forward in conjunction with pysch meds.
Puppies are the best distraction ever!
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