I just ran across this article and read the whole thing hoping for a happy ending. After I was done I wondered --- how many happy endings are there? I hate the feeling of being hopeless but today, I worry.
Here is the article if you want to read it, I assure you it will be familiar to many: Dana Reisman's story.
UPDATE:
Holy crap....I didn't read the comments to the above article, but thanks to Bristol pointing it out, I will share the comment here. I know from my own newspaper's recent comments that THIS IS THE MINDSET of many people out there. Its pretty sad that they see it this way, its absolutely no help to anyone. There is some truth to what this person says, but what they don't realize is that its human nature for people to do things even though they have been warned against it. Drinking and driving, driving too fast, eating the wrong foods, not exercising, the list goes on. Most addicts start in high school and sure - they hear the lectures about lecture, just like they hear the ones about safe sex, safe driving, etc.
The problem is, in their youthful belief that they are invisible, bad things happen to other people. Its naive thinking but they are young people that are still maturing. I don't blame the addicts. They may have chose to use, but they did not choose the addiction that ruined their lives and devastates their families.
Comment: "I spent several years as a proprietor on the west coast. The west coast was flooded with Black Tar Heroin, and consequently the neighborhood I worked in had several overdose deaths. It is sad that all of those people died needlessly. There is so much information, and so much indoctrination thru education on the downfalls of Heroin, that it puzzles me why someone would use it. I have no sympathy for those that use it or become addicted to it. Once addicted, they become animalistic creatures that pursue the drug, and will do anything to get the drug. Sometimes that involves stealing from family, and friends.Sometimes it involves acts of violence, and even the murder of people that stand in their way of committing crimes. Addicts are not victims and should not be referred to as "victims". They made poor choices, disregarding all warnings of imminent disaster. The victims are those that have to pick up the pieces of their shattered lives, and the survivors of the carnage the addicts wreak. Resources should be spent on helping the real victims., not the addicts."
Peace, Hope and Love,
Barbara
July 31, 2011
July 30, 2011
No Candlelight Vigils for Dead Addicts :(
I feel hurt, bitter and sad when I think of the difference between what happens when a young person dies in a car accident or dies of an OD.
Car accident = flowers and stuffed animals left at the crash site, the media interviewing the family asking for support from the community, crying people with candles talking about how much the person will be missed. Everyone saying "he/she was such a good person."
OD death = nothing
Many of these accidents are caused by the young person making a foolish choice, just like addiction is a foolish choice our kids made.
Just read Ron's post today, it says it way better than I ever could: An Addict in Our Son's Bedroom
Peace, Hope and Love, Barbara
July 29, 2011
HE'S OUT!
A lot happened yesterday. I knew there was a chance that he'd be released today so packed all his stuff and brought it with me to work. I also wrote him a reminder of what I will and will not do for him from this point on. He sold his car (well, I sold it for him) and is now paying his own way in life. He's going to see how fast money goes and how different it feels to spend YOUR OWN MONEY for rehab, cigs, etc. He's never had money of his own (except for the money he made illegally to buy the car but we won't go there....) so this should be a huge life lesson that he should have learned years ago.
He's going back to "United" for his fifth last chance to get the help he needs while in Opportunity Court/Recovery Court.
HE BETTER KNOW HOW FORTUNATE HE IS!
I'm excited because, even though there are benefits to being in custody, being in a solid rehab is far better for him.
I need a break. TGIF!
Peace, Hope and Love, Barbara
July 26, 2011
I said this to someone the other day, I like it:
Addiction is like an infection that spreads from the addict to everyone they have close contact with.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This is how I felt after the Anthony incident. Even those who want nothing to do with the addict can become infected by his actions just by being in proximity.
It happens all the time. I admit, I am worried about him, but I have to remember that getting near him doesn't affect only me - I bring the "germs" home and, well, then my house gets robbed.
I read about a suicide just now in my local paper. I hope it wasn't him. It doesn't sound like something he would do....but you never know.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This is how I felt after the Anthony incident. Even those who want nothing to do with the addict can become infected by his actions just by being in proximity.
It happens all the time. I admit, I am worried about him, but I have to remember that getting near him doesn't affect only me - I bring the "germs" home and, well, then my house gets robbed.
I read about a suicide just now in my local paper. I hope it wasn't him. It doesn't sound like something he would do....but you never know.
July 25, 2011
One of Us Could Use Some Kind Words
I don't even know what words to say sometimes. It just hurts to know others are hurting, doesn't it? I wish we could all just have a group hug.
Here's her blog link: Let Go Hang On
Peace, Hope and Love, Barbara
July 24, 2011
Russell Brand's Letter to Amy Winehouse
Several people pointed this letter out to me today. Whether or not you're a fan of Russell, he knows about addiction - he was addicted to heroin and used it daily for 11 years. He was able to stop. Some of us can directly relate to his words, others, I hope will never have to experience what's its like to love an addict. But I think it helps to understand, and he describes it eloquently.
I'll share the main points here, if you'd like to read it in it's entirety, you can read it here.
The priority of any addict is to anaesthetise the pain of living to ease the passage of the day with some purchased relief.
When you love someone who suffers from the disease of addiction you await the phone call. There will be a phone call. The sincere hope is that the call will be from the addict themselves, telling you they've had enough, that they’re ready to stop, ready to try something new. Of course though, you fear the other call, the sad nocturnal chime from a friend or relative telling you it’s too late, she’s gone. It is impossible to intervene.
Winehouse and I shared an affliction, the disease of addiction. All addicts, regardless of the substance or their social status share a consistent and obvious symptom; they’re not quite present when you talk to them. They communicate to you through a barely discernible but un-ignorable veil.
Addiction is a serious disease; it will end with jail, mental institutions or death. I was 27 years old when through the friendship and help of Chip Somers of the treatment centre, Focus12 I found recovery, through Focus I was introduced to support fellowships for alcoholics and drug addicts which are very easy to find and open to anybody with a desire to stop drinking and without which I would not be alive.
All we can do is adapt the way we view this condition, not as a crime or a romantic affectation but as a disease that will kill. We need to review the way society treats addicts, not as criminals but as sick people in need of care. We need to look at the way our government funds rehabilitation. It is cheaper to rehabilitate an addict than to send them to prison, so criminalisation doesn’t even make economic sense. Not all of us know someone with the incredible talent that Amy had but we all know drunks and junkies and they all need help and the help is out there. All they have to do is pick up the phone and make the call. Or not. Either way, there will be a phone call.
Peace, Hope and Love, Barbara
I'll share the main points here, if you'd like to read it in it's entirety, you can read it here.
The priority of any addict is to anaesthetise the pain of living to ease the passage of the day with some purchased relief.
When you love someone who suffers from the disease of addiction you await the phone call. There will be a phone call. The sincere hope is that the call will be from the addict themselves, telling you they've had enough, that they’re ready to stop, ready to try something new. Of course though, you fear the other call, the sad nocturnal chime from a friend or relative telling you it’s too late, she’s gone. It is impossible to intervene.
Winehouse and I shared an affliction, the disease of addiction. All addicts, regardless of the substance or their social status share a consistent and obvious symptom; they’re not quite present when you talk to them. They communicate to you through a barely discernible but un-ignorable veil.
Addiction is a serious disease; it will end with jail, mental institutions or death. I was 27 years old when through the friendship and help of Chip Somers of the treatment centre, Focus12 I found recovery, through Focus I was introduced to support fellowships for alcoholics and drug addicts which are very easy to find and open to anybody with a desire to stop drinking and without which I would not be alive.
All we can do is adapt the way we view this condition, not as a crime or a romantic affectation but as a disease that will kill. We need to review the way society treats addicts, not as criminals but as sick people in need of care. We need to look at the way our government funds rehabilitation. It is cheaper to rehabilitate an addict than to send them to prison, so criminalisation doesn’t even make economic sense. Not all of us know someone with the incredible talent that Amy had but we all know drunks and junkies and they all need help and the help is out there. All they have to do is pick up the phone and make the call. Or not. Either way, there will be a phone call.
Peace, Hope and Love, Barbara
July 23, 2011
The 27 Club
Today another musician became a member of "The 27 Club". Many people think of this "club" as being only four very famous musicians, Jimi, Janis, Jim and Kurt. But, there have been 9 deaths at this age and most relate to drugs, specifically heroin.
When I told Keven that Amy Winehouse died, his first question was "did she OD on heroin?" I told him I didn't know yet, but its a strong possibility. He said it very matter-of-factly. I think most heroin addicts have friends or acquaintences who have died from an overdose. I know Keven had one close friend and several acquaintances.
Its part of the lifestyle.
Its accepted as a risk.
Its like we know driving a car carries a risk - we could get in an accident and die. But we don't stop driving, its part of life.
And for addicts, they don't stop using, its part of their life, a big part.
I know I'm just rambling here. I always get very depressed when musicians die, especially under these circumstances. I was not a big fan of Amy's, but I've always felt that she had a true talent and a unique style. She just got started....but fell so fast and so hard, and now she's gone.
Now we get to hear all the media and talk shows asking why someone so talented and successful turned to drugs. Sigh. Some people will never get it. There doesn't have to be a reason, you try it, you become addicted and its your life.
But it doesn't have to be - Recovery Happens.
All these musicians were 27 when they died:
I can't leave out sweet, special, Shannon Hoon of Blind Melon, ( he often joked that he would be the next member of the “27 Club”. He died of an accidental heroin/cocaine overdoe three weeks after his birthday. Shannon was 28.)
- Jimi Hendrix (accidental drug overdose that caused asphyxiation of vomit)
- Jim Morrison (heart attack induced by drug abuse) used heroin & other drugs
- Janis Joplin (heroin overdose)
- Brian Jones, Rolling Stones, (drowned in pool while intoxicated)
- Allen Wilson, Canned Heat (suicide, barbituate overdose)
- Pete Hamm, Badfinger, (suicide)
- Ron McKernan, Grateful Dead (liver disease from alcohol abuse)
- Kurt Cobain, Nirvana, (suicide) used heroin & other drugs
- Amy Winehouse, (yet to be determined....) used heroin & other drugs
Peace, Hope and Love, Barbara
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