More Info on the Epidemic of Opiate Addiction and the Disease of Addiction

I found this article very interesting. It talks about how physicians are limited to treating only 30 patients at a time with Suboxone (or similar opiate blockers) while they can prescribe opiates as much as they want!

You can read it on Psych Central, here.

Another related post from that site, also by Dr. Junig, says ".... why addiction is best considered a disease or medical illness, showing that the characteristics of addiction that are similar to those of other chronic diseases. The fact that addiction is a disease is no revelation to anyone who works in the field, yet there seems to be a collective blind spot among physicians when it comes to treating addiction like other diseases." The rest can be read here.

Peace, Hope and Love, Barbara

A Lost Youth? How Long Will It Take?

My entire family has only been together once in the last three years, last June.  Yesterday would have been another opportunity for a "family photo" but thankfully no one brought it up because it would not have been complete without Keven.  He's missed so many holidays, get-togethers, etc.  

Its hard for me to accept the fact that he may continue missing out for years to come.  I don't want him to miss out on these years of life, my 20's were fun, adventurous and relatively carefree.

When we were new to this evil disease, I, like most parents, thought it would only take a rehab or a jail visit or something of that nature to knock some sense into him. Once he had completed a good  rehab he'd figure it out and choose to move on with his life.  I wish.  It takes total commitment from him and a good solid recovery plan that is his top priority above all else.  It usually doesn't happen in the first few years, but I hope for him it does.

As Lou said on her blog today:

I'm convinced the road to recovery is long, winding, and paved with different recovery tools. There is a huge difference between "alcoholic" and "problem drinker". Between "substance abuse" and "heroin addict".
"If you are new to a family member's heroin addiction, do not be lulled by brief periods of sobriety (whether forced by jail /rehab, or voluntary). Heroin is a long haul. Heroin doesn't go away because of negative consequences. You don't just quit heroin. If an addict does not have a life long recovery plan--abstinence, the 12 steps, the 10 commandments, medication, or some combination of these-- heroin will be back."

Here is a link to her blog, please read it.  Even if you already know this (as most of us do) we have to keep educating ourselves so we can help others who are new to this.

Peace, Hope and Love, Barbara

Missin My Boy - and a rant

Some days I miss him a lot.  Like today.

I'm against locking addicts up in jail, sometimes it does more harm than good (what good does it do????)

What always fails to make sense to me is that the American Medical Association declared addiction to be a disease in 1956 - yet we are treating it as a crime.

The criteria for addiction as a disease:

Primary: The illness exists in and of itself. (But may manifest in addition to other illnesses.)

Chronic: Does not go away, heal spontaneously or remit.

Progressive: Over time it gets worse.

Symptomatic: Can be diagnosed by the way it manifests in a person’s physiology, behavior and lifestyle.

Fatal: If left untreated will result in death.

Treatable: Proven medication, therapies, and lifestyle changes do result in the ability to live without the abused substance

But we keep stuffing our jails and prisons with more and more drug addicts.  Sure, the commit crimes related to drug use (mostly theft to get money for their drugs) but what if we treated them instead of locking them up again and again.  Instead of all the money taxpayers spend on housing, feeding and guarding over these prisoners - how about it we spend it on some TREATMENT OF THE DISEASE instead?  Only the very wealthy (or the very willing to go deep into debt) can afford the outrageous cost of in-patient drug treatment (and that's with insurance).  Its not right.

Wow.  This was going to be a simple post about missing Keven, but it kind of got me going on one of my many pet peeves...


Peace, Hope and Love, Barbara

Blogging Has Changed for Me

This morning I'm trying to catch up on blogs.  Its amazing to me that I used to keep up with over 100 blogs.  Now I read only the addiction related blogs plus a few that are very special to me for one reason or another (Erin, Bob, Joey, Linda, Iris, Shawna, Seano and Nikole).  Occasionally I get to read some of my other favorites (Max, Joe, Amber, Lilo, Dana, Deb) and a few music blogs, but I don't even comment most of the time.

I just don't have the emotional energy I used to.  Sad, but true.  I'm not the person I was once and that person is gone forever.  At least a part of her is.  As I said in a comment to "There is No Hero in Heroin":

I try to fool myself sometimes thinking there is an end in site…I’ve witnessed a few success stories and know that its possible. But like my son always reminds me – he meets lots of “old addicts” in jail and rehab and at meetings, but there are few old heroin addicts. My boy is in jail right now too. I am enjoying the peace and wondering what will happen next. I sat across from him yesterday, he looked so healthy, clean, handsome and hopeful. My boy. My only child. He’s never made it longer than three months in the last three years (I thought he made it nine months once but found out that was a lie). Part of me died when all this began. It was the part that held hope, experienced pure joy, and felt real peace at times. It will never come back and I’ve accepted that. I will settle for occasional hope filtered through reality, joyful moments and peace when I know for a fact he’s safe and clean (which as you know is rare).

Also, I've noticed that a lot of people that used to blog have quit. I think blogging has become less popular since the immense rise in FB users. Those of us who still blog seem to do so for one of two (or both of these) reasons:

- writing is in our soul
- we are passionate about something, so we write about it

I guess I fall into both categories.

What is my point? I don't know, this is just what came out when I sat down in front of the keyboard. I suppose my point is that addiction infiltrated my life and everything has been affected, my health, my peace of mind, my relationships, my finances, my social life and even my writing.

Two AA Slogans for today:

"We aren't bad people trying to get good.
We're sick people trying to get well."

"The disease is progressive.
So is recovery. "

I need to remember that Keven has a disease, a disease without a cure. He can control his disease but it will never go away completely. Accepting that is the hardest part of all this. Even after all the knowledge I've gained on this topic - I still want to BELIEVE that some day he will just be "all better". But like cancer, it can come back at any time. Recovery is a PROCESS not a one time (or two, tree, ten....) time incident. 

 Progress - not perfection. Right.  I'll take what I can get and keep hoping for the best.  Deep sigh.

Peace, Hope and Love, Barbara

Bad, by U2

I had breakfast with two good friends this morning.  One asked "so how are you doing musically?"  This sounds odd, but I know what she meant.  She knows that my passion is music.  Music makes me come alive.  When talking about my favoirte bands my eyes light up, I become animated and excited; the inrtoverted me takes a back seat when it comes to music.

So when I mentioned that I may not go see U2 this summer (not because of Bono's recent injury, because I just don't feel like it), she was worried about me.

Its true.  I haven't been myself.  I usually LIVE for the summer concerts and there's a few good ones coming up.  I have no desire to go.  But hopefully that will change.

I came home and put on some U2, and it helped.  I listened to a song Bono wrote when his good friend Phil Lynott from the band Thin Lizzy, died. (check him out on my GBNF blog*)

Phil died from years of abusing drugs.  It reminded me that addicts have a disease.  A disease that is not easily treated.  A disease that controls their every thought and action.  I can't imagine trying to fight a disease with no cure that had the potential of ruining every aspect of my life, and, to top it off, left me being looked down upon as "weak" with little compassion and understanding from society and sometimes friends and family.

Phil never recovered from the disease.  His drug of choice:  Heroin.

The song is called "Bad".

A few lyrics that stand out to me:

If I could, 

you know I would

if I could, 

I would let it go

this desperation

dislocation

separation

condemnation

revelation

in temptation

isolation

desolation

*Ironically, when I started "Gone But Not Forgotten" over five years ago it was alarming to see how many of the rock n roll deaths were attributed to heroin.  Little did I know then its evil grasp would someday snare my own son.  Last night he said "I will use it again someday."  God help us all...


Peace, Hope and Love, Barbara

NAMI Class Four

Its kind of hard to explain what we learned tonight - it was about the brain and how if functions.  It was interesting to actually see photos of what a normal brain looks like compared to a brain with schizophrenia. 

We learned about the genetic component and what the percentage risks are of inheriting the disease.

One thing I learned was that schizophrenia is not necessarily a life long disease, it can be treated and never come back after a few episodes.  Bi-polar, panic disorder, major deppresive disorder, etc. are lifelong and need to be medicated.

We learned how all the brain chemicals work and it totally made sense as to why certain meds help certain conditions.

What I personally walked away with tonight a big question:

If addiction is a disease why can't it be treated like panic disorder or bi-polar?  Why isn't there a drug to balance the chemicals in the brain of an addict?  I do believe that addiction is a disease (took me years to accept that but I finally do).  But IF its a disease then why can't it be treated like all other diseases?  Its just as serious, or more serious in many cases, than mental illnesses, where's the medication to help the alcoholic stop drinking or the heroin addict to be able to say no or the smoker to stop smoking?  So maybe its not a disease.  I am confused.  Oh well, its way too late to be thinking about this tonight.

Lets keep encouraging each other, I know a few people need some extra support right now.

P.S.  There is a new social networking site for young adults/teens with mental illness.  If you are interested let me know I will post the link.  I have not checked it out but the young woman that leads our class spoke highly of it.

Peace, Hope and Love,
Barbara

Discussing the Disease

The other day, Peggy, over at Helplessly Hoping shared about a friend that has cancer and is writing a book on "how to be a friend to a friend who's sick". (if you have not read her post I highly recommend it). Peggy is asking readers to suggest ways people can be supportive to friends and family of addicts.

It got me to thinking - how do people react to the addict themselves? How do you be a friend to someone that's using or in in recovery?

I think with most diseases, the ill person receives a lot of support, encouragement, understanding, even pity. With addiction the opposite seems to be true. Addicts are often looked down upon, judged, avoided.

Don't most of us (including our government) agree that addiction is a disease? If someone starts using a drug (including alcohol) and uses/drinks to the point that their health and/or life is at risk, then that person is considered to have the disease of addiction, right?

But still, the stigma persists. Nowadays, I feel defensive more than ashamed when discussing my son's addiction. I want people to understand its not a choice. Yes, it was a choice to use the drug in the first place (how many of us haven't made very poor choices in our lives?) but becoming an addict was not the desired outcome of that choice.

Here is a definition I just found while cruising around the Web:

Back to the disease concept. Addiction is classified as a disease because it meets the criteria of all other terminal diseases:

- It has pattern of symptoms which are similar across all types of substance abuse

- It is a chronic condition. It doesn't go away.

- It is progressive. Addiction only gets worse with continued use, and ends with death.

- The person is subject to relapse. In Australia, 66% of addicts who are lucky to live long enough to make it to detox will eventually die as a direct result of the disease.

- It is treatable. Here's the good news, while substance addiction is a terminal illness, its progression can be arrested at almost any stage. But if you are seeking treatment, it is of the utmost importance that you gain medical advice. Sudden withdrawal, even from "socially acceptable" drugs such as alcohol, can cause death through seizures and coma.

I hid Keven's addiction from a few family members for months and then just spit it out one day at a family gathering. I don't know what certain family and friends think of it, I imagine some people are judging my son for being so "weak" and me for "raising an addict". Those reactions no longer anger me In a convoluted sort of way its actually good that some people think that - it means they have no personal experience of it and therefore have not had to endure the heartache many of us know intimately.

But I do hope that things change, that people would understand that no one would choose this as their life. It chooses them. Just like cancer or diabetes or heart disease. There are things we can do to prevent those diseases, but that is no guarantee against them, some people will get cancer no matter how well they care for their health.

I'll end with something else I read on the same site quoted above:

When world governments begin to understand that the cost in providing this care (detox and recovery) free of charge is far outweighed by the benefits to society, we will begin to see an incredible drop in poverty, violence and divorce. The cost in providing this care will also be offset by the decrease in need of other hospitalization. 1 in 3 hospital beds in Australia are taken up by people with conditions that can be directly linked to drug abuse. At best, the world health systems overall are only currently providing band-aid solutions to one of the greatest scourges of mankind.

You can check out what he wrote in full here (he's in Australia and wrote this a few years ago but it still applies today...unfortunately).

P.S. My friends and family, especially blog friends, have been very supportive and non-judgmental, the occasional ignorant and/or insensitive questions is asked, I try not to punch the person in the nose when that happens.

Peace, Hope and Love,

Barbara