Anthony is still in my life, though he's not in Keven's. I talk to him a couple times a week and sometimes he comes over to grab a bite to eat or something like that. The other night he was here to pick up his tattoo kit and he looked so defeated, so tried. He's not the charismatic, talkative person he once was. He's trying to get into a rehab but there is no funding so he continues to use and get by day to day. He and his gf have no where to live. I won't let him stay here. I still love him and it hurts to see him like this.Keven seems to be doing great. You know how it is, you want to celebrate the progress they are making but it could so easily come crashing down, you learn to just be thankful for each day and have as few expectations as possible. He has four months clean thanks to the cops catching him before he used.
That brings me to my question:
There are a lot of theories on determining how much clean time you have. I am not a stickler one way or another, I don't count his time too much anymore, but I like to have a general idea of how long its been so I know how long he's had it out of his system.
He is being told several things in rehab:
1. You need to change your clean date to the day you got busted because you would have used that day.
2. You can't count the time in jail as real clean time.
3. You have NO clean time as long as you are taking any type of meds for depression and anxiety.
I laugh at the third one because anyone who understands brain chemistry and sees the difference in a person on or off meds knows that this has nothing to do with using drugs or not, it has to do with maintaining the ability to do life well. I am a wreck if I stop taking my anti-depressants so I just keep taking them.
What do you think? Just curious.
Peace, Hope and Love, Barbara
