I've heard it used a lot over the last few years and I think its actually a valid choice of words to describe life without drugs.
I thought of this because in the last few weeks there have been some huge events that Keven would have loved to attend, back in the normie days. There was the X Games, several concerts and this week The US Open. Oh well.
MY FAVORITE SPORT TO WATCH! At one point in this video Kelly Slater decides to spontaneously catch a few, watch how the crowd surrounds him when he gets out. Gotta Love Kelly!!!!! (I realize this video is too wide for the page but I don't care :)
Anyhow back to Keven, Instead of enjoying these type of events, hanging with good friends, working, etc., he's back to being manipulative, angry and acting like a full blown addict. Something I have not seen in him for a long time. He's trying every way possible to "escape" his reality and leave the rehab that he so desperately wanted to return to.
Sometimes I wish I had more than one child so I could experience a "normie" too.
Peace, Hope and Love, Barbara
8 comments:
Its a funny term huh. But I don't feel like a "normie" at all. Maybe because of my H, or my mom, the effects of their addictions in my life. I am ok with not being a normie though! I love that I found recovery and the changes it has brought about in my life.
I am praying for your boy. You just wonder "why????" Why now? Because he is sick and his sickness flares up with no rhyme or reason. I am sorry Barbara.
Annette, I don't think most of us qualify as normies because the disease affects us as well, and for someone like you its been there in your life for a long time. But you know what, I agree with you because I am a different person because of all I've learned and gone through and I have more respect for myself now. Sure, life was "easier" before and more enjoyable and I'd go back if I could, but I can't. I can only make the best of what I have.
Yes, it does flare up out of nowhere. He's at an all time new level of manipulation involving me, his attorney, and others. Its ugly and I am being forced to be stronger than I ever have been. His attorney is calling him every day to give him a pep talk along with a good dose of tough love. She's also calling me every day to remind me to STAY STRONG.
I am going to get you a rubber mallet so you can beat some sense into his tiny little head. Just how many more chances does he think he will get? Dang if that rubber mallet would just work!
Please tell him a Mom from "A Mom's Serious Blunders" said:
"Kevin you are not a cat you do not have nine lives. You have used up all your chances so you need to make this one work because I can promise you the alternative is worse."
Also, did I ever tell you how much I love your attorney?
Stay strong Barbara...Bravo for recognizing manipulative behaviors.
It's terrible to say, but you know if he gets his way, he will only learn that..he can get his way!
You remember John Mellencamp and the Authority Song. Keven will find out "authority always wins." It took prison for Andrew to accept that. I have always felt Keven is a "slow learner" (you know what I mean) just like Andrew about these things.
I was going to say normality was overrated but sometimes it must be a highly prized quality when you're surrounded by all that's dysfunctional, odd, offbeam and mentally ill.... I hope the attitude improves.
ps i wrote a highly perceptive piece about drug addiction today at the end of my post do drop by and tell me how amazing (or crap) it is if u have time!
I have never heard that term but I can tell you that I did have a second child but she was affected tremedously from his addiction. Often the forgotten one as so much time, money, and effort was spent on the addict. He had relapsed and it was far worse this time. The family was relieved when he went to jail and I now go visit my son and not the person the drugs made him. I hope that Keven hasn't relapsed. Praying for them both but mostly praying for you and me :)
Madyson --- I can't wait to pass that message on to him and I went out and bought a rubber mallet today :) Thanks for the vote of confidence, I need it, I can go from strong to weak way to easily. I told my attorney that she'd special, she does this job (works ONLY with addicts who want recovery) because of a strong passion for helping them. So she gets involved on a very personal level, which sometimes brings me to tears, she's pretty amazing.
Lou, I remember every song from everyone of that era. Too bad today's songs have the opposite message. You are right. HE CAN NOT HAVE HIS WAY THIS TIME. I admit his anger scares me a bit. I hope he will just GET IT !!!! UGH!
Gledwood, I'm all over your post. Will check it out as soon as I finish here. I don't think there is a "normal" cause we all have our quirks and issues. :)
Stacey, That is such a good point, I know its hard on every member of the family and the more kids there are, the more people that are affected. I'm glad your son is "safe in jail" and doing well. How long will he be there? Thanks for the prayers, I'm praying for us all too!
Oh Barbara....this is SO frustrating and also perplexing,...and I know, painful,of course...that Keven is behaving as he is. And although I have 2 other non addict kids...I have worried about both of them a lot too, for different reasons,..although not close to the devastation and pain that D has caused. I just don't know if I know if anyone's really a "normie"...even though I guess that only means a non-addict.
And yes...damn...Keven just needs to surrender to what he is there to do. I hope this isn't too over the top to say...but are you sure that he isn't somehow using again, in there? I know how brutal our non-normies can be(at least mine)regarding not being at all willing to conform or bend to authority...but D's like that WHEN he's using...and once not using for awhile, AND when really working the NA program...most of that turns around. Please understand that I only say this with the intention(of course) of food for thought....and would never want to give you any more concern than you already have. And of course, I'm praying for Keven to change his focus and attitude. Hope you have some peace for yourself soon...you deserve it.
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