Today K came home with a friend on a day pass. He took the bus down here then my sister picked them up and spent most of the day with them on a project (setting up a tropical fish aquarium, something they'd been planning for months).
I am driving them back up. When? I don't know. I didn't ask, he can tell me when he's ready. Normally I would have asked.
How is he doing? He seems okay but other than saying "how are you doing?" one time, I didn't pry or ask about his meds, what was new, how he was sleeping, etc. etc. etc. I let it go.
I basically stayed out of his way and let him have his space. He's been polite and cordial all day with one exception.
The ex. gf texted him so I didn't have to spend time the other night worrying about how to handle it (lesson learned).
The one exception of him being rude was when an old friend of mine (male) stopped by for a few minutes and K was rude to him. I know why - he is protective of me and he has treated all men in my life rude with the exception of one. Normally I would lecture him and tell him how embarrassed I was that he acted like that, but this time I reminded myself that he's 19 and if people see him as rude, its not about me anymore. Yes, I did feel embarrassed because he is normally Mr. Manners, and I don't like anyone to think I didn't raise him that way, but...I just have to let this one go.
Peace, Hope and Love,
Barbara
12 comments:
all good steps I think. One day at a time and letting go is good. Did yo ever post how he reacted to his room? I don't think so or at least if so, I don't know how I missed it. ????
You DID do good today!!!! I am IMPRESSED. I hope some day when I get the chance I can do as well! I think by the title of your post you feel good about it too - and I hope you do - you should!
My husband kind of lectured me today on "what I need to do when Heather comes back" (kind of like I was dumb actually!) Ad I said, "I know, I know, I know!!!! I just don't know if when the time comes I'll actually be able to execute..."
Well YOU did great :)
Hey - I was wondering the same thing as midnitefyrfly - what'd he think of his room?
Best wishes always :)
HE LOVES HIS ROOM! I shared that somewhere but am happy to share it again. He is so thankful and is very grateful that all the memories of past drug use is gone.
On the drive back to PH I got to hear him say a lot of positive things which made me feel hopeful.
I'm happy he loved the room. :)
You rocked it today! Good for you!! I'm glad he got to come and spend a day with you and that it went well, too!
Also, seems like you got some stellar input about the x-girlfriend. I just love our blogging friends. They tell it like it is and they see things with a lot of clarity!
Wishing you a GREAT WEEK!!
Sounds promising. I am so hopeful that K can get back on track. He is just so young to have given up on life already. I hope he hasn't and I hope you haven't either.
Great day on your part, Barbara. Sometimes silence says more than a lecture. The only other option is to jump in and begin straightening K out on his behavior and that's a conversation that could never end.
Way to go ! you are right, he is nineteen and you are not responsible for his actions. You did well and your took a big step on your road to your recovery. Hang in there.
So happy things went well Barbara...
All 19 years olds can be rude...Nancy's sons are still rude at times and I married their mom!
Awesomeness, BBQ. Well done :)
BTW, is that the aquarium they fitted out in the pic? It looks gorgeous.
WOW you are full of insight!
Motherhood is so over-rated :)
Happy New Year Barb
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