Another Mom...

I just read a post by Terri where she talks about running into an old friend who's son is also using.  And there was a comment left here by Debbie, another mom going through what we've all been through (and many still going through).  Debbie doesn't have a blog, but hopefully she can find some comfort and encouragment through reading some of our blogs.  I am going to share her comment here (assuming she won't mind since she left it in a public place):

This is a new experience for my family. I just learned my 19 year old son has been smoking heroin. In all honesty the signs were there I just didn't see it or maybe didn't want to acknowledge it. When we talked to my son he exploded. Later that night he overdosed on sleeping pills. Thankfully he survived that and spent the past 2 days undergoing a psch evaluation. He was just moved to a detox unit at another hospital. His attitude is good and says he really wants to get clean and to stay that way. I know he and our family have a difficult path in front of us. I don't think I have ever been as frightened as I am at this point

My thoughts for you, dear Debbie:

My heart literally hurts as I read this.  I think I can honestly say I know how you feel.  Your son reminds me a lot of my son in the details you shared.  I found out about his heroin use in December 08, he had just turned 18.  He also took a handful of sleeping pills but survived.  That was the beginning of stays in mental health units, rehabs and jail.  I HOPE THAT YOUR SON IS OPEN TO HELP NOW.  But one thing I've learned is that you can't force recovery, they have to want it.  My family has offered recovery to my son (rehabs, etc.) and so far he hasn't been ready.  Maybe he is now, maybe not.  I KNOW how disappointing and scary that is to hear.   I'll never forget my shock when we were at a family group for the first time and heard how many addicts were there for the second and third time.  I thought "wow, that's sad, I'm sure Keven will get it this first time".  Its actually funny looking back on it, but mostly sad that I was so wrong and so naive.  Try to educate yourself as much as you can about heroin.  If your son is smoking it vs. slamming it, maybe he has a better chance.  I wish I could say something really comforting like "don't worry, it gets better" or "he'll be okay" or whatever.  I honestly can't imagine a greater pain than going through this, there is no way to sugarcoat it.  But Al-Anon does help and so does sharing with others and being a part of a community (like the bloggers who have found each other through our blogs).  I don't know your son's name, and I don't need to - but I added both of you to my list of parents/addicts that I pray for daily.  One thing I can tell you is that you are NOT alone.  If you ever need to talk, email me.  Hopefully your son is one of the ones that does choose recovery sooner than later, that's my hope and prayer.



Peace, Hope and Love, Barbara